Ok, dont ask me to transalate! This is written in Nigerian Broken English, when I have time, I shall write the Correct English version. :D
Na who send me?!!!!
I go write my name for the Female Soccer Team some time back for church!!
As my friend be say I dey strange say I no dey play any sport or watch any one. hah! No be my fault say God create me physically qute! haba! (lol)
But seriously, I am not a sport person at all!! Na personal trainer I wan get. Dat way, we go concentrate on just the area wey need to be toned or firmed! And not grow muscle all over body anyhow!
No ask me wetin be off-side or left wing! Shebi I dey field the other day in my shorts and tee. And I hear left-wing and right-wing, I ask them where the buffalo wings dey? Shuo!!
Corner kick? Na wetin be dat!?
Only soccer wey I sabi, na back in the day for Naija when person dey watch Green Eagles or Super eagles! And dat na becos when I go my parents house, their cable reciever for my room dey controlled from the family room, and I no dey bother change am, so, I would be forced to watch the 'Live Match'. Na the GOOOOOOOOOAAAAAAAAAAAALLLLL part I dey like shout pass!!! So tay, one day, I shout GOOOAAALLLL when Spain been score us!! I quickly shut my mouth when I no see anyone join me shout, na him I no say I goof!!!! I kukuma change am to "RUBBISH GOOOOALLLL!!!!" . Whosai?!
No, I don try another sport seriously wey I even been dey whoop azz!!! BADMINTON!!!! yes O! I love that game!!! Haba! Yeye yankee no get am here!!! I play that game like say my life depend on am! I been get time then anyway. As NYSC person wey dey serve for govt house, no be to kill time?
LAWN TENNIS!? nah!!! not after I scrapped my qute knees on the cement court! I run!!!
BASKET BALL!? in sec school, those babes with big boobs (yoghurt factories), wey coem tall join dey bounce fragile me go one corner with the ball and their boobs!! I run!!!!
HOCKEY!? Eh egbele Oh!!! That yeye hockey stick wey dem been wan take dislocate legs wey I dey carry do my Fashion Parade for seconday school!? And that nonsense hockey put(shebi na the name of dat round thing wey dem dey hit?) that thing hit my legs tire!! And I no wait for am to hit my face. I run!!!!
TRACK & FIELD!? ROTF LMAO! Allow me start, but no tell me to collect baton continue!! nah! And we been get some pinchomick fast babes then! 100meters?!!! U wicked!!! For what naw?!! I AM NOT IN A HASTE!!!! Leave me alone!!!! This time, I run!!!!!!!!!!!!comot from their list!
AEROBICS with correct music!? Ehe!!! Na naw U come!!!!! Once in a while, I jiggy ma thang!
DANCING IS MY EXERCISE! Kapish!!
Recently, I have been stepping on my stepping machine learning SHAKIRA's "Hips Dont Lie" track with WYCLEF!! And I have lost 2 pounds in one week.. Besides, I got to look swell for the next event I got coming up! Shebi una dey call me fashion designer, I got to DESIGN! Abi? And the outfit I am wearing would be off the shezzza!!!!
Now, last week dem don start again, say make I come join basketball team! I say I too short, dem show me shorter babe, I say I no get strength, dem tell me say I dey work 24/7, so I tell dem say dat's why, cos I too busy!
bad thing now be say I get Exercising machines for my back yard, and I like as I arrange them amongst the flower beds and pots, but na to climb the cycling machine to reduce my big samba I no dey remember to do! Or the Thigh-side stepper to reducer hips, I no even remember....Na wah for me!! And I say I wan look fllyyy in summer!
Godo thing summer don dey over! Hee hee hee.....YOU! How fit are you?